What really happened to the 7 deadly sins!

I wrote this deal on what really happened to all 7 deadly sins. I'll let you figure out which person is which sin. It shouldn't be too hard.

“OH MY GOSH I HATE THIS SO MUCH!!!! UGH!!! I WANT A COOKIE!!! AND MAYBE SOME MILK AND EVERYTHING WILL BE JUST FINE!!! BUT UNTIL I GET THAT COOKIE, I WILL NOT BE HAPPY!! OH AND MAYBE A DOUGHNUT, AND SOME CHOCOLATE, A PIZZA, FUNYUNS, SOME WATER, LOTS OF WATER, A HERSHEYS BAR UMM… SNO-CONE WITH CHERRY FLAVORING AND A SPOON, A WIDE SCREEN TV… MAKE THAT A 123” TV, AND MORE COOKIES, CHOCOLATE CHIP TO BE EXACT, SOME ICE CREAM, AND I’M GONNA NEED A SODA. THEN I’LL BE COOPERATIVE. TILL I RUN OUT. THEN I’M GONNA WANT...” - Famous last words of a glutton. (Cause of death: shot by a hotel manager)

“I NEED TO GET LAID, REALLY BAD. I WANT SOMEONE FINE AND SEXY WITH PERFECT MUSCLES AND THE SMELL OF HEAVEN. HE ALSO NEEDS TO BE ABLE TO PLEASE ME IN WAYS I’VE NEVER BEEN PLEASED BEFORE. I WANT TO HURT, YET HURT SO GOOD. OH AND HE MUST NOT BE…” – Famous last words of an over-imaginative perv. (Cause of death: shot by her husband)

“UGH..WHERE AM I ? WHY THE HECK AM I ON THE COUCH? WHY AM I NOT ON MY FUTON? IM TIRED. SOMEONE GET ME A SODA. I HATE YOU ALL. YOU ALL BITE…I’D KICK YOUR BUTTS, BUT IM TIRED. WHERE IS MY SODA?! I SWEAR I’LL …” – Famous last words of a lazy moron. (Cause of death: shot by mother who gave shelter to him till he was 30)

“OH MAN AM I PRETTY! I’M THE MOST GORGEOUS THING TO WALK THE FACE OF THIS PATHETIC EARTH. EARTH ISN’T EVEN AS HOT AS I AM! NOT ONLY THAT BUT I’M ALSO THE MOST SKILLED AT… WELL… ANYTHING! MAN I”M SEXY! AND THE REST OF YOU ARE PATHETIC! I HATE YOU ALL! I CAN’T STAND TO HAVE MY GRACEFULLNESS BESMURCHED BY ALL OF YOUR FILTH! I HATE YOU!” – Famous last words of a self-absorbed freak (Cause of death: shot himself)

“I WANT EVERYTHING!” – Famous last words of greedy man (Cause of death: someone thought it included getting shot)

“I WISH I HAD BRAD PITTS CAR. I WISH I HAD HIS LIFE, HIS WIFE, HIS LIVILYHOOD. I WANT TO BE JUST LIKE HIM IN EVERY WAY. I CALL HIM BUT HE NEVER CALLS ME BACK I EVEN RAISED MONEY TO GET PLASTIC SURGERY TO LOOK LIKE HIM. ITS GREAT! PEOPLE ASK ME FOR MY AUTOGRAPH ALL THE TIME. BUT BRAD PITT IS SO AWESOME. EVERYTHING HE DOES. THE WAY HE WALKS, THE WAY HE…” – Famous last words a stalker (Cause of death: shot by Brad Pitt)

“I SHOT THEM ALL BECAUSE THEY BOTHERED ME, BUT SO DOES THE REST OF THE WORLD SO...” – Famous last word of a hateful Brad Pitt (Cause of death: shot himself)

Now I hope you get a laugh out of this, cause I was laughing my ass of when I wrote it.